You are richer today if you have laughed, given or forgiven.
[author unknown]
Like all families, mine has arguments. Disagreements. Some all-out battles. I want my children to know that to a certain degree, this is par for the course when living with people you love intensely. Your feelings get hurt. You say unkind things. Someone invades your space. You get annoyed that they won’t stop. That. NOW! Your brother takes your stuff or gets in your way. You yell at him and then tattle. You see where I’m going with this. This is normal. It’s OK. But it does NOT mean that you don’t need to make amends when you have done someone wrong. I feel that a sincere apology and subsequent act of forgiveness is a vital and healthy part of these conflicts. I want my children to experience this process within the safe walls of our home so that they understand the importance of it out in the real world. Even with strangers and mean people. It’s critical to their emotional well-being, in my opinion, to be able to do this graciously. How much easier life would be if we could all do it well and openly! I’m the first to admit, I could use some help with this, too. My husband would undoubtedly agree.
So my daughter Avery and I found this rock at a fabulous little shop in town when we were visiting my dad for Thanksgiving and I had an idea. What if we used it as a catalyst for forgiveness in our home? Here’s the plan: when someone chooses to behave in a way that ultimately requires them to apologize, but is having trouble getting the words out, they go get the Forgiveness Stone. When said person is ready to swallow that pride, they bring the rock to the person who’s been wronged. Perhaps that family member accepts the rock immediately and willingly, or perhaps it needs to simply be placed near them until the steam stops coming out of their ears. When the time feels right to open-heartedly and sincerely accept the apology, the forgiver brings the rock back to the person asking forgiveness and hands it to them gently. [Note: If the person feels unable to return the rock any other way than to hurl it at the offender's head, some more time must be taken to let peace grow in one's heart.]
Wish us luck! And by all means, go out and forgive someone this holiday season. Your heart, mind and body will thank you for the generous and freeing gift. And also, I’m very sorry. Just practicing…
t.
